hais. i'm feeling dam UGHRRRRRRR. i dunno wad kinda feeling is this mann. everythg's lke changing. i can't keep up. ppl DO change. my parents, my pals, EVERYONE. it's juz tt i gotta accept. i guess. well.. for some reason, someone was lke kinda bu shuang wif me. yea. i noe i was a little straightforward but i didn't meant to be
MEAN. frankly wad she said earlier tt day actually angered me. she sorta TOOK thgs for granted. she took feelings for granted. she took frends for granted. well, i said her, told her tt she's wrong and all tt. and aft tt i think she's lke kinda bu shuang wif me. cuz MAYBE she wasn't in the right moods all along.
well, i had my wrong. i judge thgs by my mood tt day. i was abit angered by her wrds cuz, i guess, i woke up on the wrong side of bed. yepp. so thgs worsen la. and as most ppl noe. i can be straightforward at times and this can be hurting. yea. so i guess thgs worsened even more. probably doubled the tension of everythg. i noe she was angry wif me. but i not only failed to notice, i totally ignore it. yea. so. i was partly at wrong.
thgs could haf turned out better if i didn't show my attitude. [i diao-ed her]. yea. so everthg worsened la. cuz of ME. yea. as usual. hais. i've alwaes been tt pain. no wonder ppl call me tt pain in the
ASS. hais. maybe i'm jus SUCH A PAIN. how i wished i never existed. how i wish i die this very moment. i dun lke this life of being a gud-for-nth, a pain, a useless and a very stupid person. lke wad my mum owaes scold me. she says i'm very lazy and owaes calls me stupid. hais. it's v saddening wan lehs.
she was angry wif me. i saw it all written on her face 2dae morning. but wad was i suppose to do. go on my knees and say sorry. i may end up worsening thgs even even more. haissssss. but i think she's NOT so angry wif me liao. or at least i hope.
hais. i hate myself mann. hais. i dun wanna be scolded stupid by my mum anymre. i dun wanna be beaten cuz i'm stupid. i dun wanna be tt pain. i dun wanna be useless. but this IS me. wad can i do? wad can i DO? haisss. i had been slapped, scolded hard, beaten in the head or my ear being twisted for being stupid. i wasn't a happy kid juz for ur info. but i was juz wondering, if i'm stupid, why can i still be in HCL, be in express. tt's weird. maybe i dun show my stupidness at times. i'm utterly confused. lols. hu cares. i'm hungry. go and eat LO.
